Hospitality: Simply, is the relationship between a host and guest. The reception of those who are guests, visitors and strangers. In more ancient times it was considered a duty, to care for and protect those who came into your home.
Today, I think we look on hospitality as a moment in time. A moment that we must smile, make polite conversation maybe offer drink and bread and then move along. We invite people we know into our homes, in the hopes of learning more about each other, strengthening our bonds.
What about the stranger and the visitor? How then do we make them feel welcomed? How do we bridge the gap of our comfort levels and their need to feel accepted? It strikes me how different things are now compared to even 30 years ago. We are skeptical. We are standoffish, shy and even fearful. In a world of “stranger danger” how are we to truly feel comfortable in allowing strangers in?
I remember being a young girl living in a small eastern Oregon town. A place where it is said every one knows everyone. Even though this isn’t an actual fact, you don’t really know EVERYONE. There was a feeling of community of hospitality. If a stranger was stranded on the side of the road you would stop and assist them. There wasn’t a real fear that they may actually be setting up a scam or have friends in the bushes waiting to pounce you. Today, this is what we expect. We are aware that that person saying they need help may actually be a criminal and will in fact hurt you.
So, where does this leave us. Not just as individuals but as a community and more importantly as a church community? We need to step back and look at what “the church” has done to hospitality. For those who are divorced, poor, gay etc. “the church” has been unkind and unwelcoming. Even if you and your church have been open and accepting, you have to remember that the long perceived notion is that faith based communities are not. It is a struggle to break the mold and really be a Welcoming, Hospitable community. We need to remember that when a stranger comes to our Church home we need to care for and protect them. We need to remember that they are waiting for the shoe to drop and the daggers to fly. That their walls of protection will be up against us, even though they seek their refuge in us.
It’s interesting to me, the challenges we face as a faith community. Creator Lutheran, my home church, adopted an All Are Welcome approach a couple years ago now. I believe that these are not just words but a true representation of our feeling as an open congregation. Even with that it’s difficult for some to break out of their personal comfort zones and be truly hospitable. It’s difficult for me.
I think when you break down the community and remember that we are all just individuals sharing the same church home it can become a bit overwhelming. Who is our leader in this? Who did we decide would be our spokesperson, our hospitable leader? The answer is, no one. The answer is, every one!
In 1 Peter 4:8-10 it is said, “Above all, maintain constant love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sins. Be hospitable to one another without complaining. Like good stewards of the manifold grace of God, serve one another with whatever gift each of you has received.” To me this is a beginning, a realization that I need not be the one with the chipper smile and a big “hello, welcome”. This may or may not be my “gift”. The real work is to find your “gift” and to share it. Share it with the ones you know and whom already love you. Maybe more importantly share it with the one who has no knowledge of you. Share it with the one who is seeking to belong, seeking love and acceptance, seeking grace.
Find your gift! Express your gift! Share your gift!
Peace,
Kim
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